You are my reason to be

By Youko Gingitsune

 

 

 
The moon is full in the sky tonight... this moon makes me remember a lot of Kurama, (all makes me remember of Kurama) of his smooth mane, I have never touched something softer than his fur, but not even the magnificent moon can match Kurama's silver mane... what could Kurama be doing now? In nights like this one, when the moon is full, Kurama can't avoid turning youko, his true nature calls him... because youko Kurama is his really self, Shuuichi is just the name of the human body he posses... Kurama is not human, his soul is purely youkai, but it's a soul in which human feelings have influenced... all us youkai have feelings, I can't believe I'm saying so, I feel like laughing of myself but I can't because that's true, Kurama showed me, he had showed me a lot of things and the most important, he had showed me how to love... he said that I always had a heart, that I always had that love inside me, but that I didn't know how to use it, and that's true but not all the true. It's not just that I didn't know how to 'use' it, I didn't want to give it to somebody, I'm sure that even if I had known about love before things wouldn't have been different...

When I look into your eyes I realize
That my love for you will never ever die
Together for the rest of our lives
I always got you here by me side

I accepted no one near me for more than the necessary time, I had bound with nobody, if something was in my way I made it disappear, but you... I couldn't did that with you, you didn't let me, you always were with me even when I shooed you away, you bound me to you and I haven't even noticed and when I did it was too late, you were in my way and I couldn't made you disappear because you were my target! You had always been but I didn't know till I met you, do you remember, Kurama? When we met? I thought you were an enemy, and you probably were, but I have always accepted that I loved you since the first time I looked at your deep and mysterious eyes... you were young, no, your human body was young, the first time we met it had 14 years and we fought... I was hurt and I fainted, just waiting death because fainting in front another was certainly death, but the last thing I thought before fainting was if I had ever seen eyes like yours, so beautiful but inside so dangerous, so mysterious, an enigma still inside them. But instead of killing me you took care of me, healing my wounds, watching over my sleep, helping me to fight.

Nani mo iwasu tai shimeta
Anatano yasashisa wo
Wasureru hiwa naino
You are my reason to be
=said what you said the story will end
but your kindness
will make me not to forget a single day
You are my reason to be=

That first time we fought side by side... do you remember? It seemed that we had fought together a lifetime, it was as if you could read my movements and I yours, it fit so perfectly... since that night your name got engraved in my memory along with that fiery glare behind the green orbs. We became friends then, you told me that if I wanted to look for Yukina in the ningenkai the best was to hide near you just in case and I did, but no because your reason but... it felt so good to be with you, you heard my mumblings, you never shooed me away, not even when I was in the worse of the moods... you never feared me, not even when I loosed my temper and felt like killing, you just glared at me challenging, with no fear of me, you didn't run away from because of that...

You are a dream come true
You're everything to me
You are so beautiful
You are my reason to be

The night you told me that you loved me, just a day after we returned from the ankoku bujutsukai, I couldn't told you the words, they got stuck in my throat but my eyes betrayed me, they told you all you needed to know. Do you remember how you raised me in your arms to reach your room and we made love; for the first time in all my life I let myself to be possessed, for the first time in my life I felt the warm of another's lips on mines; you took my body and with that the last resistance I could have had because my heart was already yours. You, powerful and smart thief got to stole the only thing I thought nobody could because I didn't have it, my heart!
For the first time in my life I let all my barriers down and till now you are the only one that can see through them, it's just to feel you or to think about you and all the possible barriers I could want to grow just fall down...
I don't even know when it happened... at the beginning I thought it could have been physical attraction but since I knew no much about those things... but you showed me all I needed, all you wanted, a millenary creature with an experience in those kind of pleasures that would make any god envy.
Do you know that at the beginning of all this madness I was terrified and the same time overwhelmed...? it was so confusing to me at that time. I felt overwhelmed because I had been love by the most desired creature in the three worlds, the one worship as a god of beauty... and fear because I have already heard what that beauty had done to so much beings, but as the others I couldn't avoid to be bewitched by the sensuality and mystery of that glare, that playful and sensual smile... I thought that you were just playing with me, that you wanted my body to fulfill the desires of a creature hungry of carnal desires, of sexual release, that you thought of me as one of those night stand lovers that you should have had by tons in your past. All those ideas where in my head till that night...

I never knew how good it could be
To loving you
You loving me

*Flashback*
"Ku... Kura... ma...!!!" my back arched, and my lips opened in a guttural yell as you entered deeper in me, faster, kissing my nipples and touching my body with skilled hands. I grabbed you strongly, my nails buried in your back, pressing my erection between our bellies, seen stars each time you touched that part inside my body that make me shiver with delight and want to die in your arms.
You stopped suddenly, your hips stopped their movement, your hands kept still as the rest of your body. I gave a growl of frustration and I opened my eyes to found yours barely inches from mine. You were serious, your eyes were trying to see through me, and I suddenly felt naked, it wasn't the fact that I had no clothes, but I felt completely and absolutely naked in front of those searching eyes... I turned my face around trying to escape... but I didn't know what I was running away from.
You got out of me and I felt empty at that moment, my legs hugged you, to your waist, don't letting you got completely out, I didn't realize of it till I began pushing you inside me again, but you didn't let. I turned to look at you, what have I done wrong?, my eyes asked, don't you want me?, they wondered, please don't do this to me, they begged. You moved away, parting my legs and getting out but your hands were still on me, caressing. I tried to face you again but I couldn't, my penis was painful erected begging for release, the release that only you could gave me, my anus was trembling reclaiming for the emptiness that you have let there, deliciously sore and wanting.
You caressed my face tenderly and then you leaned down over me, kissing all my face, my eyes, my nose, my lips, my ears, arousing me even more... you bit my ear's lobe and whispered.
"Hiei... do you... want me...?" I opened my eyes and looked at you. I nodded but you were waiting no just a nod. "Ha- hai."
"I do want you too, each part of your body arouse me to peak, you are so innocently sensual." I flushed, and I didn't know if to be mad for been called innocent or even more embarrassed for being called sensual by a creature like him. "I want you Hiei, I want you all... inside me."
That shocked me, my eyes widened out of their limits, my breath stopped, and I turned my face slowly to him blinking a few times. My mouth opened but I could say nothing, how much I wanted to please him, burning of the arousal of the idea but was just afraid... you seemed to read it in my face and smiled to me assurance. You kissed me passionately, our tongues caressed each other, sucking and drinking, so deep and wild I thought I would die of lack of air. Your hands began caressing my body again and you mounted me, you held my erection strongly and began pumping it, squeezing it as you engulfed me with your lips, then you began guiding me to your entrance, my penis caressing your crack. We separated our lips, we were gasping and looking at each other with burning eyes.
You turned, still sat over me, letting me see your delicious butt, you began caressing your own buttocks and your split, in front of my face you inserted a finger in your hole, making your back arch. My breath was difficult at that moment, my eyes were fixed in your moving finger, I licked mine and inserted it along with yours, taking a sigh from you and we moved them inside you, you were so thigh and hot that the single idea of being inside you made me tremble of excitement, I inserted another to probe and a noise left you throat.... I wanted to see you face, to see your pleasure, your strength and weakness and I turned you around again...

Oh, you are; oh, you are
So beautiful to me
You're everything to me
You are my reson to be

You looked deliciously aroused but that lustful smile adorned your lips as some wet bangs fell over your face. You positioned yourself over me, grabbed my penis and you penetrated yourself with it. I clenched my hands at the sheets, my eyes wanted to close by I made a hard effort no to... I wanted to see you at that moment and I did, it was the most beautiful image I have ever seen in all my live, it was priceless, nor even makai, ningenkai and reikai were a worthy price to what I had the honor to see.
You were all flushed, your back so arched that made your hair reach my hips, your lips partially open, eyes closed... I would have died happy at that moment, I swear, you looked so damned vulnerable and deliciously arousing. I wanted to move but I don't know how I restrained myself... damn, you were so tight and hot and tasty but I didn't wanted to hurt you, you had been so gentle with me the first time... the least I could do was wait till you get used to it but I felt as I were to explode at that moment...!!
You opened you eyes slowly and looked at me with a sweet smile. "fuck me, Hiei." you hissed. I felt embarrassed at your words, I wasn't used to it, it was just the fifth night we were sharing.
You began moving over me and that made me react, my hips began moving by their own volition and my senses took charge of my body, I was just aware of you and your oh so tight hole... my hands rose and began caressing your sensual, perfect and weak ningen body, pinching your hard nipples, trusting faster in you.
I sat with you still in my lap and began trusting even harder, barely aware of it, pushing you down, hugging you as you were clenched to my body with such strength that it seems I would break but my mind was so taken by the wave of pleasure that I hardly was aware of something but your tight hole, your moans and cries of pleasure. Your trembling body wrapped all around me was in all that concentrated my world in that moment.
Oh, yes... that was good, as good as been taken, I wouldn't mind the variation now and then. My body reacted and I felt yours too and we come at the same time. I yelling your name and you biting my neck so hard that made it bleed.
We both fall back, you were above me and I still inside you, our breath were mere gasps, trying to catch some air, recovering gradually of the delicious climax.
After some time of being like that you moved away to rest by my side and hugged me possessively, in a spoon like position. "Did you like it, love?"
I still wasn't used to that specifically name, love, but you insisted telling me that I was the owner of that title, youko Kurama's lover, and that I was worth of it, that it make you proud... it was still hard to believe that someone could be proud of having me, the forbidden child, the coursed... but you had never treated me like one, you had always made me fell important, someone...
You sighed and I realized that I haven't answered, but what could I say, I had loved it but the words were stuck at my throat and I cursed myself for not being able of give my love what he deserved... at least some few words that I knew would made you happy, but again I couldn't so I turned around and looked at those green depths trying to tell you with my eyes all that I couldn't with words. You seemed to understand, because in my eyes were at that moment love and devotion... and fear too... you kissed me passionately and I answered eargerly and we made it again and again and again and you let me do it to you again, telling me that I could do that any time I wanted.
*end of flashback*
All those ideas were still in my head but I stopped worrying about them, the hell with them, I had you and that was all that matter to me till now, you are the most important thing to me and I have sweared myself to protect you no matter what... no matter how much it cost me... as long as we have each other...
I jump from the branch I was lying on, to another, then another, fast, too fast to human eye to catch it, I'm going to him, Kurama should be at 'their' house by now (his and his mother's); waiting me in... in 'our' room(mine and Kurama's)
 

You are my reson to be
You are my reson to be
You are my reson to be

 

~OWARI~

You are my Reason to Be -- Saint Seiya

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