Devotion

    /Memories, so easy are they to slip into, so seductive is their call.
And how clearly they appear in my mind's eye.../
    Our names are so obvious and to the point. In fact, they seem more
suited to us than our given names so accurately do they describe each of us.
Doctor is actually a doctor, Game Master is a master of games, I keep the
gate and Sensui...He is a dark angel--a beautiful creature that was somehow
turned to the path of destruction.
    An angel...I glance over at him. He is watching that tape again. That
damn tape over and over! I do not let my disgust show on my face; it is bad
manners and Sensui hates that. What he finds so interesting about the Dark
Chapter I will never understand. Yes, it proves the evil that exists in the
human heart but then, I had known it was there all along. I just did not
care; I still do not. After all, all creatures possess this evil, humans and
my kind are just more true to it than others.
    Hmmm. I have never cared that much about anything, come to think about
it. Sensui was always the passionate one and I merely followed his lead. I
remember him when we first met. He was younger then, full of life,
innocent...naïve. I think that is what I miss the most--his naiveté. The
way he would turn and say "Itsuki, what's that?" or how he believed that the
world was black and white, good and evil. He was good fighting the
evil--pure absolutes. But, then...the incident...happened and all of his
clear-cut ideals were stripped away in a handful of moments. So he went to
the other extreme instead. Sensui has always been one for absolutes.
    It drove him insane eventually. He simply couldn't handle having his
world tipped upside down. I spare a moment or two for regrets, but then I
simply shrug my shoulders. What is done is done; there is no going back.
Besides, he is still my Sensui; he is still here by my side. He has had many
a chance to leave me over the years, but he has not. I am eternally grateful
to him for that. As for me, I could never leave him. He is the reason that
I live and breath.
    The others fear him. Some may not show it, but they do. His
unpredictable moods and personalities, his sheer destructive power. They
wonder how I can stand him. I smile; he is much better company than that set
of fools any day. And with me he is never unpredictable. I know exactly
what he will say and do even if I do not understand why. Maybe I have grown
accustomed to his erratic personalities over the years. No, Sensui is always
the same with me. Perhaps I remind him of his more stable past.   Whatever
the reason, he is always gentle; he always asks not demands. But then, he
knows that that is all he has to do. I will do anything that he asks of me.
    Even the first time he kissed me he still asked if he could. It was
rather sweet, really. He was still very young then, a teenaged boy trying
and failing to hide his nervousness. Quite different from today. No, he is
all cool confidence now. Back then, he had told me that he loved me. I had
believed him, I still believe him though he rarely says so anymore. Our
relationship has grown past such little trivialities.
    He rarely even touches me now. Most likely because the plan that was so
long in the making is so close to fruitation. The others, as well, might
take it the wrong way, see it as a weakness. It is not like we have time,
either. He is always away, observing or insuring his plans and I...well I am
busy with the gate. I must keep an eye on it at all times, but I could put
it to the back of my mind. I could do that if he asked me. I can do
anything that he asks me to do.
    From deep within my thoughts I take note of the others leaving to carry
out their separate jobs. My interest stops there, however, as I do not care
about them whatsoever. They are merely pawns whether they know it or not. I
do, however, pay close attention to Sensui as he watches them leave, a small
smile on his face.
    Suddenly, he stands up and begins to walk up to me. I watch him blankly
as he approaches and gently touches my face. His hand slides from the
butterfly caress on my cheek to fully cupping my head, tipping it up. Slowly
he leans down taking my lips and I offer him no resistance. He quickly
deepens the kiss, making it more passionate, more possessive. I allow him a
few moments of dominance before I fight back in an attempt to hasten our
union. He smiles, agreeing with my sentiments and only gives me a small nip
for my impertinence. Good then--so much the better. For now I get one more
thing to remember him by...
    Abruptly, I wake up from my daydream. At first I chide myself for having
been so involved with my memories but then I realize that it is best that
way. It is good to remember every once and awhile. Time slips by so fast.
Its passing goes mostly unnoticed by my kind but never before have I felt it
so keenly. In my mind's eye I can still see Sensui as that teenaged boy that
he was when we first met. Just as clearly, however, I can see his face as he
left me that last time. I knew what he was planning; how could I not? But
that was what he wanted...I would do anything for him. Even watch him die.
    He asked me to bring him here. I have followed his request and I have
never regretted it. In this dark, endless void there is nothing, nothing but
us. I tenderly hold his unmoving body to my chest wondering at life. And
also...did...did I ever tell him how I felt? I don't think I did...Did he
know?
    I feel a brush at my shoulder, gone as quickly as it came. Ah, Sensui's
spirit trying to comfort me. But it does not matter... I can never hold it
in my arms...and his body is too wounded, too...dead...for it to enter. It
is not his fault that he wanders, it is his fate. I would like to think that
he tries to spend as much time as possible with me. But still, I must face
the fact that he is lost to me forever. All I have is a cold, dead body, a
soul that is gone more than it is here and my memories. That cold chilly
brush comes again and I feel my fingers pass through it.
    Ah, Sensui do you have any idea the pain you cause me? Not that it
matters. I love you still. I have devoted my life to you. Every request
you have made, I have carried out and I have never left your side. You are
the reason I live, no matter what you do. Even now as I retain my eternal
vigil over your lifeless body and wandering soul. I cannot imagine life
without you. So, I will remain here forever with you, my love, my dark
angel. I promised to serve you and my devotion is eternal.